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Old lady musings

I love new adventures.  I have been having them all my life.  I learn about something new, I like it, I study it.  So far, I have not mastered too many things but that is ok with me.  I enjoy the learning process. I  cannot tell you what will catch my eye tomorrow but today, I am happily learning about essential oils.  

I have known that they existed and I knew that some people used them but that was about it.  I knew massage therapist used them to a small degree.  Then, I got old.

I see my doctor every year for that dreaded annual physical.  I think I am doing pretty good for a maturing woman but my doctor tells me otherwise.  Each year there is something new that is wrong with me. I find this to be depressing.  I think, “what the hell…why even try?”.  I know that is not a good attitude to have but I  have never been this old before.  I didn’t think it was going to be so stressful.

Then one day my girlfriend invites me to her essential oil class.  I accept, she is my girlfriend and I want to help her have a successful class.  I smell all the oils as the bottles are handed around the room.  I listen to the instructor as she tells us all about what some of these oils are good for and how we can feel better and be better by just using them ourselves.  Then I remember the annual physical.  I start wondering if there is really hope for me.

I bought the book.  It really is a great book.  It is simple to understand and the layout is superb. The photos are really good.  I start to study a little bit and talk to my girlfriend about what oils I think will help me be a healthier person.  Now what?

So I signed up with that company.  I understand that there are several essential oil companies out there to choose from but none of my girlfriends invited me to go and learn about those companies’oils.  So, here I am.  I now own about forty different oils.  I use ten of them everyday, just on me.  I use another five or six for my husband.  I will learn which ones are best for my dogs soon.

I joke that I smell like a hippy.  My house smells like hippies live here.  That means that you can smell the oils everywhere. But we do bathe everyday, unlike some of the hippies I actually know.  I carry small bottles of oils in my purse, he carries small bottles in his vehicle.  He is learning, probably not by choice, about which oils he uses, as well.

I even got my herb lady to sign up with this same company.  She is also a massage therapist so she uses many essential oils but she is always looking for the best effective naturals she can find and it turns out, she really likes the purity of these oils.  So now we have more to sit and talk about.

I have been using these oils for about six months.  Now I start to get serious.  Here is my reasoning: I am old.  Therefore, my body does not regenerate nearly as fast or as completely as I did twenty years ago.  It doesn’t matter which oils I use, my body will use them but not as effectively as it could have when I was younger.  Consequently, I start using one of the proprietary blends to actually help my bodys’ cells regenerate faster and more completely.

My true purpose is, of course, to live forever but why live forever in a broken body?  Let me continue to learn my craft, let me continue to have new adventures, and let me do it all on my terms.

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Girlfriends, journaling, Life, lifecoaching, meditaton, Native American Women, Retreat, Writing

My Sacred Journey

I have such wonderful friends.  But even as strong as we would like to be there are times that even the strongest of us hits the wall and dang, does that hurt.  We all decided long ago (everyone in my tiny circle is not as young as we used to be) that we were not going to allow that wall to stop us even if it slowed us down a minute.  So we decided to get together and have a weekend retreat.

The crew, like any crew, as specialties.  My specialty is being a life coach so I took the lead.  I named the retreat, set the agenda, made the to-do list and lined up the teachers.

We learned some mediation do’s and don’ts.  We learned some easy-peasy journaling techniques and we studied-just briefly-the how’s and why’s of “chemical reactions to emotional inputs”.  We built a “God box” to work on faith building and….we talked!

We talked and we cried and we laughed.  We acknowledged that we are strong and that we are fragile, that we are young at heart and as old as the hills.  We heard, from our own mouths, some real wisdom and some really silly notions.

It was a good weekend!

Winter is coming and this is where we needed to be….looking at ourselves, getting ready to get into hibernation mode.  We are not bears so we cannot sleep the winter months away but we are women and we can take this time to slow down and look deeply into our mirrors.  We can use this time to really think about everything we went through this weekend….to think about our Sacred Journey, about the women we walk with, about those we have left behind, about what we learned and what we want to learn next.

We will open our “God boxes” next spring after we have filled them with our prayers to see what has transpired in our prayer lives and see our how our faith as grown.  We will have laughed and cried even more when the winter is done and the spring has started again.  We have so much to look forward too.

Now I am sitting here thinking about everything that happened this weekend and find that rather than be physically, emotionally and spiritually drained I am excited and energetic.  It is so wonderful to be with such wonderful women all weekend and to know that we have fueled each other, built each other up and took the time to remind each other how much we really mean to each other and to ourselves.  I am filled with gratitude.

My sacred journey continues….

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Contemplation, Life, Native American Women

No Show

To the rest of the Friday afternoon Starbucks crowd I realize that I look just like another yuppish hippy girl ticking away at a teeny tiny keyboard enjoying a vente mocha but I  am not.  I am, in fact, a frustrated supervisor who had an interview scheduled to start half an hour ago.

I want to say that I am angry but I really am not.  I just wonder, you know?  I wonder about the people I hear who sit around complaining about their lives and who don’t do anything to actually change their circumstances.

She has a job.  I know she has a job because I read her application.  When I set the time for the interview she specifically asked for a time after her shift at her current job.  I think…wait, I thought it was admirable.  So many people just walk off the job leaving current employers hanging that it is actually refreshing to speak with someone who appeared to have some work ethic.  I suppose that this has not changed, work ethic she has….courtesy she does not, and here I sit.

There are a lot of people who say they want better jobs or better lives that can be attained by better jobs but I am just not so sure anymore.  Perhaps there are some people who really do need work and would like to have anyone meet them for an interview but not here, not today.

The coffee/frappuccino crowd wains and wanes, the professionals, the students, the expected and the “never thought he/she would enter this place” kinds of people purposefully and aimlessly order drinks as I sit here watching.  If I had any guts I would ask a few if they need jobs.  Afterall, I did come her to conduct an interview.

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Contemplation, Life, Me, Native American Women, Nature

Mko Winter Wonders

Winter finally came by.  She is walking sometimes softly and sometimes with a little anger.  She is singing quietly today but there have been days when her song was more a wolf’s howl.  I sit inside on those days, not even daring to move the curtains aside.  Those are the days that I am really feeling the bear inside.  Those are the days when napping doe not come with guilt.

I wonder about the bear often during the silent days when snow muffles all the rumblings of the day.  I put on my coat, scarf and gloves and shovel the patio clean.  I stomp around in the drifts and mounds that I have created and my feet stay dry in boots laced tight.  I think about all the animals living in the snow without boots.  I wonder if their feet/hoofs/paws are cold?

There was a time when walking along the country road and enjoying the beauty was a big priority for me.  Those days are not long gone, yet…but a little gone.  My concession, I suppose, to living past the half century mark.  I would have my camera in hand working hard to keep some record of the beauty I was privileged to witness.  But I have to tell you, during the warmer months when I look at those pictures I do not remember the cold so some of the magic is lost.  Maybe that is the real truth of two dimensions.

I wonder too, does the bear think about me?  Does she dream of me during the winter while she sleeps the shortened days away?  Does she hope that I am taking good care of myself as I do not have the luxury of a den?  Are there times when she thinks that we might be connected?  Native teachings will tell me that she does and I am happy with that knowledge, I hope she is as well.

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Life, Me

My intent is…

Intent. What is my intent? What is your intent? As it turns out, these became very important questions last week. There were about four of us sitting around the outdoor living room I had set up in the wilderness. The boys were all over at the fire enjoying the things boys enjoy when they sit around a campfire laughing their heads off….

I don’t really remember how the conversation got started but somehow we ended up talking about intent. This is one of my favorite subjects. I find that living my life with intent is so much easier then just letting things happen any ol’ way they want. Whether I have a plan or decide to just wing it for the day my intent is what counts.

I put my intent into everything that I do. If I am supervising difficult employees it is my intent to create cooperation. If I am dealing with a behavioral client it is my intent to create peace. Those are simple enough, I am cooperative, I am peaceful, those ways of “being” bring my intent into reality. Somehow this makes my job so much easier. But that is only one aspect of my life. There are other areas that my intent helps me manage what is going on around me. My nephew and I were talking to my husband one evening and we were trying to explain how powerful intent is. How someone can hurt another purposefully if they are aware of their own intent and how they can hurt another if they are unaware of how powerful intent can be. Some people would call this “witchcraft” or “voodoo”, using intent for good or bad but we are all capable of changing the world, our own worlds, with the simple act of intent. You don’t have to study any other ideology or religion to become an expert in using intent.

So this is how our conversation went:

Let me pick up this pretty little stone…let me think about what a really handsome guy you are (even though you are not my guy), let me think about what a wonderfully good time you and I can have…let me think about all of this while I am holding this pretty little stone…now let me gift you with this little stone. Wonder how long it will be before you start thinking about me? Let me pick up this cool stick, let me draw hearts all over it and color those hearts with this red crayon, let me wrap a few strands of my hair around this cool stick and carve some simple little swirls to make it look cool…now let me gift this stick to you. Wonder how long before you start thinking of me? Matter of fact, wonder how long before every time you see a silly little swirls or red heart you automatically remember that silly stick and start thinking of me? Let me cook a meal for you…now let me get really angry at someone else while I am cooking and just continue to cook your lovely meal while I am angrily stirring the pot and making the dessert. Wonder how long it will be before you come down with a wicked case of indigestion?

The girls were amazed, they had never thought of intent in such a negative way. I then explained that intent can go both ways. All intent can be positive as well. You do not have to create a negative situation with intent. The important point of the whole conversation was to remind my friends that intent matters. It always matters. There is really no time that we are not intending something. We are children of God, does that not make us Creators as well? If God said “Let there be light” and there was light how am I any different? If I am his child am I not as capable? Oh true enough, I may not be as experienced with my intent as God is with his…as I have not created light just by speaking it into existence…but I am working on it, I am. I am working to use my intent to better my life and my world. I like peace, I like balance, I like joy…these are things that I intend to create…I’ve been practicing!

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