I had a very interesting weekend. There were grandchildren, children, old friends, new friends and one new acquaintance, that was the interesting part. I expected the family to visit. It was Father’s Day weekend and it has become a nice tradition for our oldest to take his family to Holiday World and the waterpark on the Friday before Father’s Day then stop by our house on their way home to visit. They spend the night some years camping out in the back yard and some nights camping out on the living room floor, depending on how healthy everyone is when they visit.

I expected the friends…old, new, lost and found.  Our house has become the social hub of the extended family so we have people over almost every weekend.  Now as we get into the “Sundance” season we are hosting more and more ceremony as we all get ready to begin our new year.  This weekend there was a new acquaintance that one of our friends brought over to meet everyone.  She seemed almost normal, at first…

You have to understand a little something about my life to understand some of the insanity I am exposed to on a regular basis.  I am a Native American woman.  I was born the person I am.  I never wondered why I was born this person, I only accepted that this is who I am.  I began my life in a very traditional way.  My mother was probably too young to be starting a family but she did.  She was raised by her grandmother.  Five generations back from me there were no English names recorded for anyone in my family….all names were Potawatomi names.  My mother later decided that she would not stay on the rez (reservation) but that she would move her family to a place where they would all have more opportunity in all aspects of life…school, education, work.  I grew up after the age of 9 away from the People.  I was thrust into a world that I had very little knowledge of and like any foreigner in a new land, had to find my way.  All these years later, I am living a traditional live (Native style), following a traditional Native religion…this was my choice, this was what felt as the natural and balanced and right way to live.  This is our way of life.  We don’t question why we do what we do we just do it.

What we do question is…why do people who are not Native find it necessary to insert themselves into our way of life?  We don’t question it like those people should not come and find out what we are doing.  We don’t question why their own religions cannot feed them the things their spirits need.  We just want to know why you are here?  Why this house?  Why this family?  We don’t expect a standard, “only one correct” answer to our questions.  I think we have the right to ask.  This is not a public building, not a church where we go out and invite strangers to come and “find God”.  Those are things you can do…or not.  It’s your life, do what you think you should.

People who find this way of life matches their personalities, fills the emptiness they have in the core of their beings, answers the questions they have been asked about “why are we here?”, ok.  Others, and this is the interesting part started for me…who claim to “have their own way” whether it is a religion or just following a path of their own making then decide come to our home then proceed to tell us that we have to allow them to be here…I have a problem with that.

If I tell you that you can do something you asked to do at my house or tell you that you cannot do something that  you thought you should have been allowed to do at my house you might want to be very careful how you respond to me.  Again, this is my home and you chose to park in my driveway.  If you are not a Native American woman please do not tell me what I believe or what I don’t believe.  If I take the time to explain to you how Native women think (and I can do that as I am a Native American woman) don’t tell me I am wrong, especially if you, yourself, are not a Native American woman.  Please have enough respect for yourself to understand that you are the one who is being drawn to this way of life.

I love meeting new people.  I love sharing my way of life with people who are interested to know.  I try, I really do try to help other women understand about our Native way of life if those women want to know and I don’t have to recruit women to teach, so many come looking for balance.  I am happy to help and I don’t care what color your skin is or what religion you follow.  But don’t look me in the eye and tell me I am wrong…..the road you came in on goes out the same way…take it!